Get those reps in!

Tonight's edition of Harleen's Dating Life features a crucial life lesson I've learned through my fitness regimens lately: don't skimp out on your reps!

At least once a week (twice if I'm feeling particularly optimistic), I participate in a "circuit training" with Alex, my friend and colleague, which goes something like this:

5 minute walking warm-up; (18 rows, 18 squats, 18 triceps dips, 18 reverse curtsy lunges on each side) x 3 sets; 8 minute walk/run/jog; (18 bicep curls with lunges on each side) x 3 sets; 8 minute walk/run/jog; (15 forward lunges on each side, 25 reverse crunches; 25 mountain climbers) x 3 sets; 5 minute cool-down.

Now, you might think all of that is a bit insane, but I'll tell you something - it sure as hell teaches you patience and perseverance. When you're at 13 reps of your final set and you know you need to pack 5 more squats in, you maintain your focus and get them done, knowing that you can't quit because you have a number to reach. When you're at 6 minutes and 45 seconds of running, you remember that the next 75 seconds of your life will go by just as fast as the 75 seconds before that - you just need to get through them.

And here's how this translates into real life:

When you're on a date in your apartment (note: never under any circumstances, invite a guy to your place until after at least the 4th date, and even then - be wary), and you're watching the stupidest movie known to mankind (Space Balls), just remember, that every minute of that dreadful movie that ticks on by, is going to move just as fast as the minute before that, and the minute before that. There's no point in slamming your head up against the wall to avoid dealing with the uncomfortable cuddling-but-not-cuddling on the couch. It's like you're back on the treadmill again. Counting down the seconds isn't going to help you, but knowing you can get to the finish line, that will. You can't keep counting down the minutes on the Netflix - you've just gotta get through them! The date will be over before you know it. Push through, persevere, maintain your patience...and then never call/text him back. And, to vent out your frustrations for being such a moronette and allowing this sleazeball to get a second date with you, hit the gym. You'll feel a lot better.

Also, another side note - if a guy defines his height as "5'7 and 3/4''"...but claims to be 5'8''. No. Just, no. Walk away. And then run.

The Worst Date(s) Ever

As you may have noticed by now, I uploaded 5 posts I wrote last year during quite possibly the worst (yet most entertaining) week of my life. I've always wanted to publish my story (and by "story", I mean completely non-fictional account), and figured it would serve as a nice reminder that no matter how bad a date gets, it can't possibly get as bad as that week in Geneva. If you'd like to read the horror story/comedy show, scroll down to April 2013 and check it out. The posts are from a series of emails sent to close friends, hence the second person audience addressed. Enjoy!

The best way to get promoted? Suck at your job.

Over the past several months, through my work life and otherwise, I've come to a very clear realization: If you don't want to be doing something anymore, go ahead and suck at it.

A few things will happen when you showcase your abysmal performance:

1. No one will ask you for help/to do that thing anymore. For example, if you absolutely do not want to be calling the travel agent to book time-sensitive flights for your colleagues, make sure to leisurely get to know your travel agent's 14 grandchildren's names and hobbies on the phone, allow ample time to spell-uncheck to ensure any important documentation has a few critical mistakes, and hey, if you forget to do the task all together, you're pretty much guaranteed to not be stuck doing it again. A repeated pattern of offense is also crucial - first time offenders are usually forgiven, but after the second time, you're on your way to BS Task Freedom.

2. People will realize that you're just not suited for such a role, and instead, they will try to find a "better fit" for you. For example, if you refuse to get along with the members of your team, this may involve switching over to a different unit, so you become someone else's problem/joy. If you're just so terrible, but great to get along with (to our faces, at least), you will find yourself moving up the chain to management. There's nothing like managing people to do work that you, yourself, suck at doing.

(Note: If you work for a real corporation that promotes and awards based on a true meritocracy and respect for your work, I highly advise you to not oblige by the aforementioned advice. You're in a league of your own.)

Extreme Cheapskates

On a Saturday afternoon with no date lined up, I clearly have nothing better to do than watch some TLC programming. After watching Extreme Couponing (a show I can only aspire to be on), another show came on immediately after, entitled "Extreme Cheapskates". On a date earlier this week, my new friend (Jewish Italian guy from Queens) and I (Punjabi Indian girl from suburban northern Virginia) talked about the great lengths our parents would go to in order to save money for the future and their kids. The two of us come from two of the most successful demographics in this country (according to him, at least), and we are very proud of how our parents were able to rise from nothing and become who they are today.

This show takes that "rise to riches" idea in a completely different way though, and never in a million years could I imagine either of our sets of parents participating in some of these ridiculous activities. Yet, there's something to learn from everything. Lessons learned from today's episode:

• Why pay for what you can't consume? At a grocery store, before paying for your fruits by the ounce, feel free to take off the parts you can't eat, e.g. cherry or grape stems. You can't eat the stems, so you shouldn't have to pay for them.
• Dental hygiene is incredibly important. Dentists wants you to floss, so it's only their duty to provide you with enough floss to last you a lifetime. If you think that little white packet of floss can't last more than a few months, you'd be surprised at how long it'll last when you rinse off used pieces and hang them on your clothesline until next time.
• Craving ice cream? Rather than spend $2-3 actually buying a cup or cone of the good stuff, just ask for samples. 31 flavors and $0 later, you've got a full stomach without compromising a cent in your wallet. No need to feel guilty when you walk out - they want you to sample the flavors.
• Date night? No problem. Use vouchers for the movie tickets, and after your date is settled into her seat, sneak out to pilfer through the trash, find empty soda and popcorn containers, then demand your "free refills" from the poor high school kid at the counter.
• And finally, if she wants to go somewhere "expensive"? Take her to a gas station.

I can't even tell you how many times I had to stop typing so I could gawk at my TV with a face comparable to that of when someone farts. If anyone tried any of this on a date with me, I can tell you right now, I would be running out that door faster than a cheapskate running to get free samples at Costco.

I understand that people can go to great lengths to save money...or they can spend that same time and effort to make money. They say money can't solve all of your problems, but money can at least solve your money problem and keep you off of embarrassing TV shows that will ridicule you across America. 

Options, people. It's all about your options.

What's in a name?

"So what's with the name of your blog?"

Well, I'm glad you asked, Hypothetical Reader.

Let's start with "Leen Forward". In addition to getting excited about a whole new year of unrequited resolutions, this is the year in which I hope to make some very promising changes with my life (said everyone, ever). I have to admit, as thrilling and mind-blowing as 2013 was for me, it was also kind of stagnant. I may have traveled a bit around the world, but I also very much stayed in the same place. Here's to hoping 2014 is different. Here's to hoping in 2014, I make my mark, I speak my mind, I take risks and make mistakes, and I don't back down. That's the most important part. 

You learn quickly in kickboxing, while holding a punching bag for your partner, that if you don't lean forward to absorb a punch or kick, you will shake, you will stagger, and you may even get knocked over. But, by leaning forward, you empower your body, you withstand the blow, and you live to fight another day. You plant your feet in the ground, you tense your muscles, and you don't back down. Not only in my weekly kickboxing classes, but in every day, I hope to find that same balance, stability, and power.

While finding your footing, you also have to make sure you're taking care of yourself, and sometimes that includes saying no to other people. I am absolutely horrendous at that. I'm one of those people who can be juggling 10 things at once, and someone will throw another flaming torch in, and I'll be sweating like crazy, but still manage to keep the fire in the air for everyone else's amusement and joy. If that's not the definition of unhealthy, I don't know what is. I recently read an article on Huffington Post (Hello 2014: 21 Ways to Live a Resilience Life) featuring a quote I need to use more of: "That doesn't work for me". It's not a "no" per se, but it's a start. It's a way to set boundaries, to know your limits and project them on to others, and to maintain your firm footing and center of gravity. In short, it's a way of earning respect and not letting people walk all over you. I have to admit, I haven't tried uttering those five words yet, but I'm excited to give them a test run.

Finally, before you think I can't spell, one of my (many) nicknames is "Leen", hence the play on letters in the name.

Word of advice - kick boxing class is a much more efficient use of time than jail.

Introduction

Some say the best ideas come from happy hours; I say they come from coffee shops - which is precisely where the idea for this blog began (thank you, Tianna). Let's be frank. If it was a real happy hour, neither you nor I would remember any of our ideas.

So why this blog? I already have 3 others that I've invested time in before giving up on, so clearly I don't understand the word "commitment". I do love writing, however, but my day-to-day unfortunately doesn't allow for a lot of creativity, at least outside of whatever wit I can insert into email replies. I've realized I need to capture my learnings - from the drama I observe in a highly-emotional work team, to my forays into online dating, or just my general musings/epiphanies/rants. That crystallized intelligence has to go somewhere, and it might as well come with a "share" button.

I've decided this blog isn't going to be about anything in particular, because you really can't compartmentalize your life. In addition to my aforementioned statement of purpose, you can expect to read about my travels abroad, the delectable restaurants and hot spots I have the fortune to enter, pet peeves and ways to deal, my concrete belief in the power of positive energy/motivational quotes/all things warm and fuzzy, dating how-to's and probably some of the worst date stories you will ever read, and general advice I would like to give to the world. If any of that tickles your fancy, I invite you to read on - immerse, indulge, and inoculate yourself.