Extreme Cheapskates

On a Saturday afternoon with no date lined up, I clearly have nothing better to do than watch some TLC programming. After watching Extreme Couponing (a show I can only aspire to be on), another show came on immediately after, entitled "Extreme Cheapskates". On a date earlier this week, my new friend (Jewish Italian guy from Queens) and I (Punjabi Indian girl from suburban northern Virginia) talked about the great lengths our parents would go to in order to save money for the future and their kids. The two of us come from two of the most successful demographics in this country (according to him, at least), and we are very proud of how our parents were able to rise from nothing and become who they are today.

This show takes that "rise to riches" idea in a completely different way though, and never in a million years could I imagine either of our sets of parents participating in some of these ridiculous activities. Yet, there's something to learn from everything. Lessons learned from today's episode:

• Why pay for what you can't consume? At a grocery store, before paying for your fruits by the ounce, feel free to take off the parts you can't eat, e.g. cherry or grape stems. You can't eat the stems, so you shouldn't have to pay for them.
• Dental hygiene is incredibly important. Dentists wants you to floss, so it's only their duty to provide you with enough floss to last you a lifetime. If you think that little white packet of floss can't last more than a few months, you'd be surprised at how long it'll last when you rinse off used pieces and hang them on your clothesline until next time.
• Craving ice cream? Rather than spend $2-3 actually buying a cup or cone of the good stuff, just ask for samples. 31 flavors and $0 later, you've got a full stomach without compromising a cent in your wallet. No need to feel guilty when you walk out - they want you to sample the flavors.
• Date night? No problem. Use vouchers for the movie tickets, and after your date is settled into her seat, sneak out to pilfer through the trash, find empty soda and popcorn containers, then demand your "free refills" from the poor high school kid at the counter.
• And finally, if she wants to go somewhere "expensive"? Take her to a gas station.

I can't even tell you how many times I had to stop typing so I could gawk at my TV with a face comparable to that of when someone farts. If anyone tried any of this on a date with me, I can tell you right now, I would be running out that door faster than a cheapskate running to get free samples at Costco.

I understand that people can go to great lengths to save money...or they can spend that same time and effort to make money. They say money can't solve all of your problems, but money can at least solve your money problem and keep you off of embarrassing TV shows that will ridicule you across America. 

Options, people. It's all about your options.